May 06

Marvel has better super heroes than DC: Fact. And, even though DC has reigned in the movie adaptation biz up until recently, the shift over to Marvel has begun, and get ready, because it looks like Marvel’s in it for the long haul and are ready to expound upon the statement made initially by Spider Man and now by Iron Man.

Between mecha-fighter Iron Man’s second movie, coming in April 30, 2010, and military-sponsored super-soldier Captain America, coming May 6, 2011, Marvel Comics’ upcoming movie slate has a very militaristic feel. But where’s the peaceful shrinking scientist Ant-Man, who communicates with ants? Apprently his movie’s on hold, so we can get Norse god Thor’s movie, directed by Matthew Vaughn (Stardust, Layer Cake), on June 4, 2010. Captain America’s full title will be The First Avenger: Captain America, and his film will be followed by The Avengers in July 2011.

I’m glad they’re redoing the Hulk, but if they really want to fix past failures they need to look seriously at Daredevil. Or Ghost Rider. In fact, let’s just go ahead and ban Nick Cage and Ben Affleck from any and all future super hero movies. For the genre, I think Robert Downey, Jr. and Ed Norton are exactly the kinds of actors needed to fill the roles. Though I thought Eric Bana did an okay job as Bruce Banner, he just wasn’t right for the role. Ed Norton looks like I might imagine Banner looking like, so, casting is at least better in this adaptation than in the first Hulk. And casting is monumentally important in super hero movies. Just plugging in any-ol’ star won’t work with us fanboys. The actor must fit the role. Like Robert Downey, Jr. in Iron Man. If they’d given that role, as was originally planned, to Nick Cage, or even worse, Ben Affleck, even if nothing else in the movie had changed it wouldn’t have been as good.

For Thor and Captain America, casting is going to be equally important. We–I’m speaking for Fanboy Nation here–don’t care so much about the big names, we just want to see the character fulfilled. We want the actor to fit the role.

The forming of Marvel Studios should help make comic movies a lot better. They should be more focused on presenting the characters faithfully to the storylines already established. Or at least I hope they will. And they’ve got to, because they’ve all but ruined comic books with crossovers multiple titles for the same characters.

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written by Matt Mitchell \\ tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

May 03

Iron Man told a great story, had plenty of plot, great acting, only a couple of moments of significant cheese…all the things that make a great movie. But, ultimately, I’ll remember it most for what it failed to do, for the dearth of Iron Man himself. It’s a problem a lot of movies have: how to tell the story, and still incorporate all the action the audience wants to see. I remember the first time I saw Beetlejuice, I thought the same thing: this could have been a good movie if there’d been more Beetlejuice. Same with the first Hulk movie. The list goes on and on of movies that were good–don’t get me wrong, I did like Iron Man–but didn’t quite quench the thirst for more. Maybe that’s the plan, to give audiences just enough to make them want more, to better guarantee the sequel and–the Holy Grail of Hollywood–the franchise. Iron Man will undoubtedly become a franchise. There’s way too much potential here for there not to be, and I believe everyone will love it. I did, I just wish there’d been more Iron Man in Iron Man. 

This, I hope, won’t be a problem in Iron Man Two. All the setup is done now, and the movie can start with ol’ Iron Head patrolling the skies above Stark Industries. Who’ll be the bad guy in the sequel? Who knows. Iron Man doesn’t have a very good rogues gallery. His arch enemy was Mandarin, which could be very cool if done well.

Here’s another little problem with the movie: They gave too much away in teasers. You can barely go through five minutes of film time before you see another moment you’ve already seen in the various teaser trailers on YouTube. The entire first fifteen minutes of the movie is summed up in teaser trailers. There is nothing new to learn by watching the movie. I think they could have sold the movie just fine with the one scene of Iron Man falling from the sky into a crater, and then ascending, menacingly, to fire repulsors at bad guys. End. Follow the Cloverfield example; simplicity really can work very well when done right.

Overall there were maybe five or six repulsor blasts in the entire movie. This is a problem. They added a very cool little pulsing sound effect to the repulsor blasts, but then barely used them the entire movie. Oh, and when it came time to fight the bad guy at the end…well, some things are best left unsaid, right?

Overall it was a great movie. My only gripe is very simple: I wanted a movie my 3-year old would sit through (once the DVD comes out). Unfortunately, there are only about ten total minutes of this film that my son will care about seeing. And those were my favorite moments, too. I wish the entire movie had been like those ten minutes. Will I watch it again? Will I buy the DVD? Hell yes. In BlueRay. Because those ten minutes I was just talking about? They freaking rock. And the rest ain’t bad at all.

Where does Iron Man fit into the pantheon of super hero movies? I’m still working on that list; in the meantime, go check out Iron Man, just don’t take your three-year old.

Iron Man Movie

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written by Matt Mitchell \\ tags: , , , , , ,

Apr 25

Batman’s utility belt, Quasar’s quantum bands…there are tons of superheroes (and villains) out there who’ve accessorized to better enable them to perform their duties. Reed Richards has made a living out of building gadgets and machinery for his team and for the world at large. He designed unstable molecules so he and the rest of the Fantastic Four could remain clothed while using their powers. Unstable molecules might sound fanciful, but they fit right into the vein of scifi tech made real if you look over at the nanoscience industry. Unstable molecules actually sound like a precursor for nanobots if you think of it that way.

But who has the best accessory in comicdom? Captain America’s shield would get a lot of votes, as a symbol as well as a useful instrument. Some might vote for Wonder Woman’s various accoutrement: her silver bracelets, her golden lasso or her ridiculous invisible jet, but I wouldn’t. If I was voting for hottest chick in comics she’d be right in the top ten, but in my humble opinion, her gadgetry is unimaginative and lame. Ditto for Green Lantern’s ring, which is an awesomely powerful item, with the tremendous drawback that it is powerless against anything colored yellow (Damn! Beaten by a banana). Some would vote for Wolverine’s claws, but again, not me. Primarily because I don’t consider them an accessory. They are a part of his body; he can’t take them off and leave them on the bedstand when he’s sleeping. They just snict right back into his arm. So the verdict on Wolvie’s claws is: immensely cool, but not qualifying.

The list goes on and on:

These items have no power augmentation or special attributes: 

  • Captain America’s shield–unbreakable, yes, but does it fire lasers? Sadly, no. 
  • Elektra’s Sais
  • Batman’s utility belt
  • Deadpool’s swords
  • Green Arrow bow and arrow
  • Moon Knight’s utility belt
  • Hawkeye’s bow and arrow
  • Hawkman’s mace

These items are imbued with some attribute which increases their power, or the power of their wielder:

  • The Infinity Gauntlet – infinitely powerful, but in the end it’s just a glove with little gemstones on the end of it; not very cool. And besides, picking this as the coolest accoutrement is kind of like picking Superman as the coolest superhero. Sure, he’s cool, but who can beat him? They defaulted his character as the most invincible being there is (at least in the DC universe). (I’d put my money on Galactus against Supes, especially if G’s just eaten a nice, fat, juicy planet).
  • Thor’s hammer (Mjolnir)
  • Quasar’s quantum bands
  • Annihilus’s Cosmic Rod – cool and classic, but then so is…
  • Silver Surfer’s board (From here on out I’m omitting anything imbued with the power cosmic on the basis that they are defaulted to be infinitely powerful and yet are too hard to define)
  • Iron Man’s suit
  • Wonder Woman’s lasso, bracelets, and invisible jet
  • Green Lantern’s ring

I’m probably still missing some, But which is best? When it comes right down to it there are only two that really deserve to be in the conversation at all (for me, anyway):

Thor’s hammer and Iron Man’s armor, both from Marvel Comics and both awesomely powerful (but not too powerful, not infinitely powerful). Let’s break it down:

Mjolnir, Thor's Hammer

Mjolnir

  • Imbues wielder with super strength and invulnerability 
  • Forged by dwarven blacksmith of the mystical Asgardian metal Uru 
  • Can summon the four elements: rain, wind, thunder and lightning
  • Can open interdimensional portals
  • When thrown, if you hold on to the strap very tightly, enables flight (basically it yanks you through the air at tremendous speed. This is probably the coolest flight adaptation in comicdom outside of Hulk’s bounding ability)
  • When thrown, returns automatically to the spot from which it was hurled after it strikes the target
  • Can be recalled to the hand of the wielder

Iron Man’s Armor

  • Imbues wielder with super strength and near-invulnerability
  • Jet boots enable supersonic flight
  • Is equipped with numerous defense systems: repulsor rays, pulse beams, missile launchers, lasers, tasers, and flamethrowers
  • Has a unibeam in the chest that can emit various types of light energy
  • Helmet contains comm and recording devices and scanning equipment

In the end you have the ultimate gadget–Iron Man’s armor–and the ultimate mystical relic–Thor’s hammer. I think I’d be okay with either one.

Iron Man Armor

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written by Matt Mitchell \\ tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Dec 17

My Iron Man post of a few weeks ago got me thinking about comics and collectibles in general and, more specifically, why I don’t buy comics any more, and a few reasons became immediately clear:

  1. You can’t buy comics in the grocery store any more. When I was a kid I actually looked forward to going to the grocer with mom because I could squat on the floor at the comic book rack and pick out a few to take home with me. I could keep up with the whole Marvel or DC universe on an almost weekly basis. Today, to get comics you must go to a comic book store, of which there are very few, or a book store, which doesn’t carry many titles.
  2. They’re too damned expensive. I have no problem with costs rising and prices rising. But the prices of comics have risen too much. There was a time when I could buy every comic in the Marvel Universe as they came out, but now, with so many titles which sell for over $3.25 apiece, there’s no way I can afford to keep up with more than a few.
  3. Too many titles. This is especially true when there are several titles for the same group, like the X-Men. The X-Men were doing so well in the 80s that Marvel introduced several other X-titles. And it was evident that those new titles weren’t there to further explore the universe, they were only there to increase sales. It was pathetic, and it was ultimately what drove me away from comics in the first place.

The biggest mistake made, in my opinion, was that they began to market to collectors rather than their fanbase. Today if I go to a comic store to buy a comic the shop owner will ask if I want two copies, one to read and one to keep in pristine condition. This, to me, goes against all logic and reason. For starters, the reason comics were collectible in the first place was never because they were marketed to collectors, just the contrary, it was because collectors didn’t buy them until they became collectible. Comics were collectible because kids bought them, and very few of them survived being read and carried around in a back pocket and torn, ripped, and shared among other kids or traded for marbles.

When the clerk asks me if I want my comics bagged I tell him no. I read my comics and then I stick them in a box. This always is met with shock and disapproval. “How can you not bag them?” they ask. And I answer, “Because I buy them for the story. To read.” I don’t buy them for their presumed potential value in the future. And will they be valuable in the future? Hell no. Not when you’re selling two to a customer, one to be kept in pristine condition forever. Why should I keep them in baggies? The industry itself is ensuring they won’t be worth a dime as collectibles because of the way they’re marketing them.

One of the great (stupid) tactics of the comic book industry was when they began rolling off limited-print special-cover copies. They’ll do two covers, and print a bazillion copies of one but only two thousand of the other. So basically they’re guaranteeing that there will be two thousand pristine copies of that comic book enshrined in a static free, lint free, oxygen free environment for at least a thousand years. Actually, for the publisher I guess that’s a good move, but for the would-be collector it’s a stupid idea to buy them with any expectation that they’ll actually one day be worth more than the cover price.

No, a comic is collectible is when it’s fun and interesting and when only a few copies survive through the years. The one that was stuck in a box unread and forgotten is the one that’ll be worth the most money in the end. The things that are supposed to be collectible might enjoy a brief spurt of collectible frenzy, but in the end the only things that wind up collectible are those things that weren’t to begin with, the rarities of the world.

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written by Matt Mitchell \\ tags: , , ,

Nov 26

I am engulfed with fanboy frenzy. Next up on the calendar of movies I’m dying to see but will probably be disappointed with (see: Daredevil, Ghost Rider, Punisher, Hulk, etc.) is Iron Man. I’m a comic reader from way back, and Iron Man was always one of my favorites (along with Daredevil, Ghost Rider…). Iron Man was one of those B heroes: he never sold a lot of books like Fantastic Four or Spider Man, but he was always imminently cool, like Daredevil and Moon Knight. Basically the story line should look like this: Billionaire alcoholic playboy who builds advanced weaponry has a side gig as the iron-clad super hero protector of Earth. Nobody had gadgets like Iron Man, nobody had cool like Iron Man, either. It almost makes me want to start reading comics again. Here’s the teaser trailer, when it’s over you can exhale:

The only problem is that it can’t be as cool as it looks, can it? Robert Downey Jr. has, like Tony Stark (Iron Man’s alter ego), had his share of ups and downs. And though I’ve known for a while that he was cast in the lead role I haven’t been very excited about it. His acting technique has never seemed quite to fit with what I had envisioned for Stark. But this teaser makes him seem like a really good fit. I’ve got to hand it to director Jon Favreau, it looks like he’s done a great job of directing… a trailer. Jury’s still out on the movie. But hey, lately there have been some movies that I’ve been excited about and have actually been good: 300, Transformers, Casino Royal, and Sin City to name a few. (You might note that all the movies referred to in this post are movies that were based on some other medium and were not original ideas. The movies I seem to get the most excited about are the ones based on things that I liked when I was a kid or have always wanted to see modernized and put up on the silver screen.)

Fanboy Moment: Iron Man in the comics was one of the five or six most powerful beings on the planet. In sheer strength, only the Hulk and Thor could really overpower him. I seem to remember one situation where Iron Man was sent to corral the Hulk during one of his “Hulk smash!” rampages, and Iron Man powered up his armor and laid the green giant out flat. Knocked the Hulk unconscious. For the fanboy in me, this is a monumental statement. Of course, the power required of that knockout punch drained Iron Man’s suit of energy and he collapsed in a heap almost simultaneously. Sure, there are a lot of other super-strong heroes: Colossus, The Thing, Rogue… but they’re all second or third tier when it comes to brute strength. If I had to send one Marvel hero over to DC to duke it out with Superman, it would have to be either Thor or Iron Man. Hands down. /Fanboy Moment.

One thing I really would like to know: Why don’t we all have gadgety suits of flight-capable armor by now? I mean, this is the 21st century, right? Aren’t we all supposed to be able to fly to work by now? Where’s my Iron Man suit?

Iron Man

It gives me chills. It really does. (In a good way.)

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written by Matt Mitchell \\ tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Jun 22

I’ve had it with all these costume changes. In the first issue of the new Nova series, a fabulously written event occurs in which the Nova Corps are decimated and Richard Rider is the only one left. The Nova World Mind subsequently uploads into Rider, endowing him with all the power of the entire Nova Corps and, just to piss me off, changed his costume. Dammit.

I realize there’s a time to freshen things up, I do. Wolverine going from the yellow to the brown was a good change, but it happened because he did it, not because he got an upgrade in power or something. He didn’t increase in rank and get new stripes. He just switched to brown because he was out of yellow material or something. It was even better when he ditched the costume and just wore his jeans and boots. I don’t so much have a problem with costume changes, I just hate it when the change comes by way of a power boost or some such nonsense. Especially when the current costume is good enough. Where do you stop changing costumes? What if Marvel suddenly changed the Silver Surfer’s look? Or Galactus?

So; for the record: the new Nova costume almost sucks (it does have the cool little glowing chest medallions, but the pointy things on the shoulders and the form-fitting helmet–no), but the new Spider Man costume sucks ENTIRELY. As soon as I saw it I vomited on my foot and shot myself in the face with the power cosmic. (–no need to say it; nerd alert. I know.)

I’m really happy to see Marvel bringing back some of the old-school characters: The Celestials and the Eternals, Moon Knight, Quasar, Nova, Annihilus, Super Skrull, etc. But I wish they would give the old a chance before they update (i.e. downgrade) the costumes. Until they start wearing regular clothes just leave the Underoos alone.

One costume I would like to see changed: The Watcher. Here’s a pitch for Marvel: Uatu, weary of the constant attacks on his beloved Earth, finally gets pissed and kicks a little galactic ass. He’ll have to upgrade his… ahem… robes. He’ll also have to change his name, cause he wouldn’t be watching any more. The new Watcher would be doing. Now if I can just get someone to draw me a bad ass Watcher

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written by Matt Mitchell \\ tags: , , , , , ,

Mar 06

Back around 1988 I bought a copy of a comic called Lone Wolf and Cub. I liked it, but it wasn’t something that jumped out and said YOUMUSTBUYALLOFME! so I bought couple more and that was it. I still have the ones I bought. Anyway, my wife, knowing that I am very interested in Japanese culture, especially in the fuedal (Edo) era, found the first and second issues of the graphic novels and bought them for me. I’m now up to ten, and I could spit in my own face for being foolish enough not to see right away how incredible this series is. I’ve never been much interested in Manga–the big eyes and spiky hair do nothing for me–but this artwork is sublime. The format is perfect; it’s a 4×6″ book, so it fits right in my pocket, unlike most graphic novels today that are bigger and bulky and might draw second looks from disaproving corporate managers that own my Lease On Life. If I’m not mistaken there are 32 of these books. I will soon own them all. You should too. I know all the Cool Kids already have them all and I’m just joining the party late, so excuse me if you’ve heard this already.

P.S. Sleep has been a problem lately due to corporate cutbacks, but I’ve survived the ice age, in case you were wondering. Today they let me know that I get to keep my own job. The sun will rise on another day, after all. This pic was taken with my cameraphone off my back porch a few early mornings ago…

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written by Matt Mitchell \\ tags: , ,