This just in…a new supplement that inhibits defecation?!? Basically, you take this pill once a day and you never take a crap again, and impossibly lose weight at the same time, since you only have to eat once a week because your body is living off of … well, feces. And evidently if you order now you get a free order of RareLEE-P. (If you don’t use RareLEE-P in conjunction with DoDoDon’t your urine will turn to the consistency of snot, whereas with RareLEE-P, urine remains “watery but pleasingly infrequent”).
Take this all-natural supplement and never defecate again! The body absorbs 100% of all food that enters it, totally nullifying the incessant need to doodoo!
PLUS!
Don’t defecate + Lose Weight at the same time! That’s right, you heard it here first, with this pill you can eat all you like, never passing any waste from your bowels, and lose up to ten pounds per day! You’ll be thin in no time with DoDoDon’t, the magical all-natural wonder drug from the makers of RareLEE-P.
Next thing you know they’ll be making a supplement that gives (ahem) waste a pleasing fragrance.
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April 2nd, 2008 at 12:57 pm
Dude, You forgot April Fool at the end. :-)
April 3rd, 2008 at 8:05 pm
Heheh… so, should I make that a double order to go?
April 4th, 2008 at 9:48 am
make that a Double order to NOT go.
April 8th, 2008 at 3:24 pm
The more I think about this, I don’t think I could ever use such a pill even if it was true. At my age, taking a good dump is one of life’s few great pleasures left to me.